Insight:I updated the past few days today. I was realizing that some things were slipping and didn't want to be honest with it about myself. Part of this is the thought that if I'm honest with myself about failure then I've got to be hard on myself about it too. Looking back over the past few days logged though I can see I did do some things and slacked on others, I learned things and I should apply that to the future.
Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards. - Soren kierkegaar
Staying positive is such a part of my methodology now, but in situations where I don't know how to be anything but negative I enter into a bit of a stasis. I know that previous to any shift, my old self would have abandoned this project for that reason.
I had a talk with a friend a couple weeks ago about taking pride in your work, doing things the best you can do. I believe that, but right now would be a good example of when strictly thinking that way is detrimental to progress. I know that if I wanted to I could do all of the things in this project without failure. I could go door to door selling hugs, set aside time for writing, go to free yoga near St. Marks every day to stretch. These are all good ideas even, but the goal isn't just to do these things, it's to find a positive way to have them enter my life, and dealing with conflicts is important for resolving them.
How can I make things that don't necessarily perfectly fit into my life, fit into my life.
How can I better see something as objectively beneficial, emulate change, and create a shift.
sow seeds of knowledge and let them grow organically.
if they grow strong harvest their bounty and if they are weak nurture them.
Structural: Sleep 6 hours nightlyFell asleep late, 5 or so and woke up around 11.
Physical: Stretch regularly (min 20 minutes)I stretched during the classes a couple times when I was participating.
Mental: Learn 10 common sayings in 10 different languagesDunno if this should be considered cheating, but when I looked it up it said they are not to be confused with each other.
Peut-etre: Maybe (French) [Claire]
Peut etre: May be (French)
Fleischwurst: Bologna (German) [Just remembered this, was told it meant meat sweats a few years ago]
Musical: Listen to only classical musicDidn't listen to any music. I've been whistling quite a lot now, and singing along to songs that are definitely not classical. I almost bumped some tunes last night, I've been aching for it really. Even though I've listened to some music that wasn't classical through the month I haven't played the music I've wanted to hear, the stuff I listen to invokes an emotional response that brings me closer to how I want to feel all the time.
Creative: Practice better penmanshipI've written some haphazard notes on the tiny moleskine. My handwriting is abysmal but I did decide that I want to be able to write notes and letters in good pen. I've always just excused the bad handwriting when writing something out instead of realizing that something well written is a nice touch. The handwriting should be reflective of the extra time, care, and thought put into something.
Emotional: Hug 5 peopleHad my hug me sign on and got a couple of hugs at the classes today. That easily topped my five. I think I could have gotten more if I was a little more bubbly, despite the hug me sign I don't think I was all that approachable.
2/21/2010
